Yeah. Make all the jokes you want about the title.

I am actually refering to Handel's'Messiah'.

I walked into my private lessons.

'We need to have a talk about professional edicate,' my instructor, Sue Logan, states frankly. I fidgeted uneasily. I knew that I was a few minutes late, and that, because of a concert, was not able to attend a rehersal with the Billings Youth Orchestra as I had intended. My mind immediately drifted off to the worst scenarios as she dug in her bag, listing all the rules of performing edicate for a performer-
-Arriving on time to a rehersal is arriving late. Always arrive 15 minutes or earlier for rehersals. 30 minutes for preformances.
-Black is your dress code. Black stockings, black shoes, black pants, skirts, ore dresses. Jewlery is to be minimal. Bling is for the soloists only.
-If you can't make a rehersal call and inform them.
-Address the director by Dr./Mr/Ms Such and so
-Always call to confirm practices and rehersals with the people that hire you and the people you hire.

And this list continued on and on, leaving me curious as to where she was going with this conversation. She then withdrew from her bag and a minilla envelope and put it in my hands.

'I feel as though you are ready for this now. I am putting my ass on the line for you by giving you a recommendation for this. BUt I wouldn't do that for you if I wasn't sure that you could handle it. And if this talk has scared you any, then good. That was my intention.'

I open the manilla envelope and pull out the score for the second oboe to Handel's 'Messiah'. My heart leapt into my throat and my hands shook with giddiness. I felt tears welling in my eyes.

'It's a paying gig, Amanda. I am expecting a lot from you.'

'You'll get it,' I promised solemnly with a broad smile. 'My everything and so much more.'


I cannot put down in words how happy I am about this- out of all her students, she chose me! Not only that, but I sang in our city's Messiah festival as a choir member last year. While I sang, I would look at the oboists enviously, longing to be where they were at. I never thought I would be playing for the 'Messiah' festival so soon. Three to four years is what I thought last year, but here I am! One year later and I am playing it!

I am as frightened as I am excited for this. I have a month to prep for it, and a little over a month to prepare for all my other concerts as well as pull together a few more solo peices.

If I excell, I'll get more gigs. If I fail, odds are that it will take a lot of cajoling to get others to pay to have me play for them. Luckily, the read throughs went very well, aside from a few rhythm errors. I am just going to have to work with my metranome (My leetle friend) more.

And fishing for compliments no longer works as well as it used to. Tried it today while running through 'The Messiah'.

'How am I doing, Sue?' 'I nailed that part, didn't I?' 'Aren't my upper octaves just coming out beautifully?' 'You're not going to tell me, are you?'

'Nope. That's for you to figure out on your own now.'

'Dang it!'

'Welcome to the professional level, Amanda. If you do well, your audiance will tell you. I no longer need to stroke your ego to get you to want to give me your all and play well. I save that for my beginners. You are beyond that and while you still have a lot of catching up to do, you are excelling at a rate that I have never seen a student progress at. I don't need to tell you what you already know.'


I still would like compliments, but I think that her trust in me and recieving her comments and 'The Messiah' surpass any compliments she could give me.

That and the look on my dad's face when I asked him where 'The Messiah' was was quite priceless. (we own it on CD, and I couldn't find the CDs, that, and he was a pastor for ten+ years).